Monday, November 29, 2010

TMZ Help the USA

Have you ever watched TMZ?  I mean really watched it?  Its breathtaking.  The relentless pursuit of truth in the world of celebrity.  It's a walking talking oxymoron.  And they're good at it!!  Harvey Levin and his intrepid team of reporters follow anyone who just got their 15 minutes of fame (to paraphrase Andy Warhol) and then keep following them for their next fifteen months of infamy till someone else's 15 minutes is more sparkling in light of tiny HD cameras.

They follow Lindsay Lohan to a McDonald's, they ambush Atlanta and New Jersey REAL housewives as they peck and scratch at each other and Mel Gibson will never have a day of peace in the outside world again.  Did these celebrities ask for this?  Of course they did!!!  Thank God for TMZ or we might just forget they even exist.

Personally I am in awe of their dogged determination.  I believe all of our national security concerns could be nearly eliminated if TMZ would go after a group of people who really want celebrity.  Why doesn't TMZ charge the hills of Pakistan, swarm throughout the streets and poppy fields of Afghanistan and find the Terrorists?  Nobody else can find them but I bet TMZ can!  Granted armed only with their dinky cameras and a quest for any truth they might meet with some resistance but that's never stopped them before.

They sniff out extreme behavior in the most inaccessible places on earth already - the club scene of LA.  Who would you rather meet in a dark alley running to their limo or Bentley?  A blitzed out Mel Gibson or a sober guy who can't get his underpants to explode?  Thanks to TMZ we know that answer. Go to it TMZ!!!  And make sure that big TMZ logo is all over those underpants!!!!